it is really incredible how much coffee improves my mood. i know i’ve said it before but the difference between days i’ve had coffee and days i haven’t is kind of horrifying. is it just a placebo effect? am i extremely susceptible to chemicals? i used to think i was Not Allowed to hack myself with chemicals, out of some “but that’s cheating” purist philosophy, but i’m glad to report that i have realized we have to “cheat” at the stupid reality games and that the meritocracy is a joke so i should do every goddamn hack i can on myself and just live. so i’m trying. it’s an uphill battle to hack myself so that i care for myself but i’m trying.
I don’t like caffeine addiction, and what I really mean is headaches from withdrawal. I don’t really get any other negative side affects. But the withdrawal headaches are enough to make me question the entire ordeal.
I have a sense of wonder at Mormons and others that refrain from caffeine and liquor. Is their life like mine? Can we ever tell? Do people move between those particular worlds, or are the chemicals we ingest part of our make-up from then on?
viruses become part of our dna forever. and pathways in our brains get made and unmade by chemicals. i think it has to be both at the same time… that some people can and do move between worlds, and that it does become part of our make-up even after we change habits. but we are still changeable.
Saying that way makes me think: we are so lucky to be made and unmade in such fundamental ways! It means that when we are harmed we are not permanently harmed. Just changed. Healing happens.
Not sure what this has to caffeine or pens! Saturday, amirite?!
Was kinda in a funk for a couple days, and then was super busy for a couple days.
Today was pretty busy. Had to help out with a minor extended family emergency this morning (eveyrone is fine though) and ran around accomplishing real life social commitments like another session of the Maji Monsters RPG.
Trying to finish up laundry tonight so I can have a real break tomorrow.
so many cherries! were the blossoms from it beautiful, too?
i got a kaweko liliput (black body, medium nib) and a j. herbin glass dipping pen. i also got the j. herbin rouge hematite (red with gold sparkles) ink i’ve had my eye on for years. they don’t carry twsbi because twsbi sells to retailers at retail price. the kaweko (and j. herbin glass) pens were inside the display counter.
the lamy section was quite popular! we marveled at a 14k gold nib (so so smooth) and a telescoping retractable pen that reminded me of a rocketship launch.